Fact or Fiction: More than 5 primary flavour descriptors in a wine review = wine bullshit?

As is the case with most topics on wine, there is a 3000 word treatise waiting for me to post on the topic of wine writing bullshit, and all the associated reasons behind why this term exists in the first place.
Irony being a wonderful thing, I am probably contributing to this topic at the moment (to add to the collective mass of wine writing bullshit, look out for a comparative analysis on wine wankers and wine snobs coming soon).

However, to focus on the second fact or fiction question (first one is here), it is a relatively narrow and qualified one: if you read a wine review that has more than 5 primary flavour descriptors do you tune out, become angry or condemn it as being wine bullshit?

If your answer is 'fiction'/5 descriptors is fine, would you draw the line at 10 descriptors? 15?  If your answer is 'fact'/5 descriptors is too much, to quote You Am I, how much is enough? 3? 2? a generic 'tastes like red/white wine'?

Interested to hear your  thoughts on this as there are many variables (Grange vs Yellowtail = considerably different number of flavour descriptors, etc), and I have not even mentioned how many descriptors should be used to define a wines nose/bouquet.......

New Red to Brown feature: 'Fact or Fiction' Topic 1 - 'Savaging Sweetness’?

Below is the first of a semi-regular series of posts to encourage further debate or discussion about a particular wine topic. In a way, it reflects the banter that goes on between Red and myself at a tasting, dinner or any related function where wine is being discussed or consumed . All thoughts and opinions are welcome.

‘Savaging Sweetness’?
Looking over our tasting notes, and the notes of many other published and amateur wine writers / bloggers, it appears that sweetness in wine is seen as a negative characteristic, and not only when it is in the overt ‘syrupy’, ‘cloying’ range (note: I am thinking more of dry table wines, rather than those intended to be made in a semi-sweet / off-dry/amarone style). Given that many of the highest selling wines tend to be sweeter than they are savoury, it brings me to the first RedtoBrown Fact or Fiction Question:


Fact or Fiction: Is the existence of sweetness in table wine treated by wine critics and bloggers in a similar way to the existence of bacteria in the water we drink – tolerable, though only at minute levels?

Is this true or false? Is sweetness derided so strongly by many/some? Is there a common tendancy to tolerate sweetness to a point, but go to town if it is obvious / put a caveat on any good wine that is sweet? This observation throws up some related questions/hypothetical questions, such as:


• Does a red wine have to be savoury, or at least have a spine of savouriness running through it to be considered top quality?;
• If the ‘savaging of sweetness’ does exist in wine writing, is it driven by snobbery/elitistism?
• Is a red table wine with overt sweetness considered flawed from a viticultural and wine making perspective in every instance?
• Is the number of sweeter wines being sold a result of the region the grapes are grown (eg high crops, irrigated vines, dry, warm climate) or is it a result of consumer demand for this style of wine?
• Will the tastes of consumers in the premium bracket change to once again seek out sweeter table wines?
• Has Robert Parker Jr had a positive/negative impact on the appreciation of sweeter wines (or any other critic, including those who praise super-savoury wines)?


While the questions will not keep Andrew Jefford or Jancis Robinson awake at night (and have no doubt been posed 1000 times before), I hope they generate some thoughts for some. Interested to hear your view!